How to find a balance between family and career? We ask psychologists

Columnist Valeria Lorca answers your questions along with psychologists. Write about everything that concerns you, in the comments, and our experts will try to help you.

Have you ever seen a successful career woman, in whom both her husband is loving and candy kids? So that one marriage and love-carrots? This is rarely seen. As a rule, successful beauties either have a third husband and are much younger, or the child is left to himself and loves the nurse more than the mother. And from this a lot of problems. There are, of course, exceptions, but they, as they say, once again confirm the rule. And why? Because the husbands of these women can not stand the success of their wives and leave. To others. Simple. Weak. Homely. The usual. To feel like a man next to them. In general, the answer to the question is obvious: finding a balance between family and career is difficult, but extremely necessary. After all, all these earned money and opportunities do not bring satisfaction to a woman without a family. If you can still walk up to 30 and build a career with all your might, then other thoughts come to mind ...

Admittedly, most of our women do not work for pleasure and professional growth, but simply because of money to feed their families. In Moscow, there is plenty to choose from, and in the regions, working at the plant is already for happiness. Therefore, the reasons for the absence of the mother / wife at home can be different ...

In general, there are two extremes in this question. The first - when a woman refuses professional self-realization and devotes herself entirely to the family, turns into a servant. Often, men from these also run away. Like, their "world" beyond the kitchen, school, garden and at best a beauty salon does not come out and talk to them about. The other extreme, when a woman does not appear at home and the thoughts about the family in her head occupy the last place. It seems as if the thread is being lost with the household ...

How to find a balance between family and career? We ask psychologists

Find out what psychologists advise?

More contact

If you are forced to disappear at work on days and nights, then this time must be reimbursed to your family at the weekend. And it is not enough just to be at home, to cook soup in the kitchen and to wash the floors, you need to communicate. It is better to get a visit or a walk. But all together. So that household chores are not distracting. The family needs to be shown: “Look! I am completely yours! ”Warn your colleagues not to call you on weekends. Weekend - family time.

He is the head of the family, not you

Career leave at work.Despite the fact that you are all so businesslike and impossible, you need to be a wife and a mother in a family. Work is secondary.

Nobody canceled SMS

Get in touch with your children and husband at least twice a day. Despite the workload, you should be aware of what is happening with your loved ones. Psychologists say that couples who send SMS to each other throughout the day are the strongest. And to write an SMS, do not need a reason. This can be an anecdote, a joke, a simple "I miss." Get a group in WhatsApp, share funny pictures.

Stay in private

It is important to remember that you are not only parents, but also spouses. The children will grow up and start their own families, but the husband will remain. And it is important to maintain a relationship with him.

Dream out loud

Psychologists advise not to dump work problems on her husband. At home it is better to talk about pleasant things, to discuss joint plans. More positive.

Support your loved ones! Rejoice in their victories!

And now your questions:

Oksana, 28 years old, Moscow:

My husband calls me a career woman because I spend a lot of time at work. Indeed, I leave early and come late; I do household chores only on weekends.He asks me to give up this job and sit at home cooking borscht. Only I earn more than him. To the question: what shall we live on? - he replies: “We will not die of hunger”. But I do not want to give up everything and stand at the stove.

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